I have really been slacking in the blog department.
I can tell you that this little break wasn’t entirely by accident. For awhile the subject most on my mind was the one I wanted to talk about the least. I started to write a couple of times but 2 sentences in would hit the X and walk away.
What I don’t want is for this blog to turn into some weepy, self-serving cry for attention. I don’t want to post every time I’m feeling down or whenever I’m having a lousy day, complaining and feeling sorry for myself. This blog was never intended to be an angry rant. The problem is, that is when I feel most compelled to write.
Truthfully, I don’t know what this blog is meant to be. It started with a response to the story Pissboy told about us, so it didn’t begin on a light or happy note, really. Our story (one side of it) was already out there, and I saw it as an opportunity to not just spill my guts on unwitting strangers, but to let go of some of the thoughts and feelings I was having throughout our troubles. It was a continuation of our story, and while every post has not been about us, the foundation of this blog was just that.
I’ve been conflicted along the way, wondering just how much to reveal. Some of you are no longer strangers out there in the internet universe, but people whose faces I see fairly frequently. Some of you have become our friends-in real life, not just online. So it’s begun to feel a bit strange when I put our business out there, or hash out some emotional issue I’m having via this blog. I’m not just anonymously casting these feelings out into the universe for strangers to view and sometimes weigh in, helpful or not, supportive or not. It's personal.
And it’s not just me that I have to think about. How much information does he want out there, for friends and acquaintances to see? Part of me argues, “well he started it”, but that’s not very helpful. Or fair.
I'm conflicted. This isn't the first time I've posted a blog like this. I am not really sure what to do at the moment.
I'll say this much:
Fuck Jesse James and Tiger Woods. Fuck them both very much.
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I'm having the same problem! Before Facebook (and I'm not complaining, I LOVE that I "know" all of these fantastic people because of Facebook!), there was an anonymity and a distance that allowed for more revealing entries and I had an easier time expressing my real feelings about stuff. It's hard. I go back and forth on what I should and shouldn't publish. Good luck!
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